Friday, 12 February 2016

Small Steps, Big Changes

It's been such a long time since my last blog post; so much has happened in our lives since then (some good, some bad) and I am so happy to be back with you to hopefully inspire you to get the most of out family life.

I've been on a roller-coaster journey this last year and have had some real highs and lows. There are things I've learned that are helping to attract more positivity into our lives, and this particular post comes at a very apt time as Valentines day approaches.

Whether you go in for the flowers, cards, chocolates, special dinners or not, all relationships, especially those where you are parents, are so important to support a healthy family lifestyle. With increasing pressures in society, it's easy to put your partnership on the back burner while you help your children with homework, make the dinner, wash the dishes do the washing, pack the lunch, catch up on that report for work etc. By the time this is all done, where is the head space and energy left for moments to connect with your partner?

I certainly don't think there is a code that can be cracked to solve this one, although there ARE things that we can start adopting into our lives to help us be just that little bit more positive about the hectic lives we lead; which in turn, brings down the stress volume and gives us a bit more energy to make more of an effort to connect with our partners.

This post really only scratches the surface but hopefully by following these two basic principals, you should start to notice a positive step change in your lives.

1) Learn to love yourself. This isn't about vanity or thinking you are above anyone else. It's focusing on and taking the time to think of all your great personality traits to remind yourself that hey, you are actually a good person that deserves happiness. Example - "I am kind" or "I am courageous" and then follow that up with reasons to "prove" those statements to yourself , example "I went the extra mile I help a colleague out at work" or "I moved to a new company/city/country and started a new life" etc. The theory is, the more you focus on the positive, the happier you feel within yourself and in turn the people around you will feel happier too.

2) Help your partner to love themselves. Not only will your partner benefit personally as mentioned above, this also helps you to focus more on the great things you love about your partner which in turn can strengthen your relationship (when things are tough elsewhere in your lives, you generally tend to focus more on your partners traits that are not so great!) Everyday think of something you love about them and, either say it, send it as a text or write a little note and leave it where they can find it at home. They'll start to see through your eyes what you love about them and it will help them to register in  their minds aspects of their personality that they should be proud of.

Once you both get into the habit of reminding yourselves of your wonderful qualities, hopefully it will mean the start of even more happy times together as a couple and ultimately as a family unit.